Secret blog could mean the blog is a secret or that I tell you secrets in the blog

In my first year of highschool, when I was 13, we spent half an hour a week in a room full of computers and did quizzes. We were supposed to answer questions nonstop. The questions were extremely easy. I was too scared to ask the teacher/supervisor if I could leave, so I pissed my pants.

I am still bad at leaving rooms/situations. Last weekend I was at a party, standing in the kitchen. I wanted to leave for 30 minutes without moving. Then I just walked straight out without warning. My friend Penny said 'Are you leaving Tom?' as I walked out the door. I quietly said 'Yes'.

I want to say something about why I am like this/what it means/how I can improve but it's 12:45am and I can't think.

My real name is Tom.

Today I read Fences by Ben Brooks. It was cool. Ben is cool. Idk. I like the different font sizes thing. I wanna do some stuff with that. Also with colour. Even though this book is way different to Grow Up it felt similar to me.

Tuesday/Monday (in the US) is date night. Me and Caro watched Inland Empire. The Lynch fest continued. Weird movie. I didn't like it as much as Mulholland Drive, that was my fav so far. [I should have written this post earlier in tonight. I'm too sleepy now]. So this movie blurred the line between movies and reality and the line between movies and remakes. It puts scenes from reality (which imitates art), a movie (which imitates reality), and a remake (which imitates the movie (DUH)), and the folktale the movie was based of (idk) next to each other with no explanation. It puts FAR less of the pieces together than Mulholland did. I was gonna say some clever shit about this but now I can't. Maybe Caro will write something. Hopefully. Movie was too long. David Lynch always has sweet songs in his movies. Next up is Blue Velvet.

Fuck I'm mad at how bad this blog post is. I'm really sorry.

My copies of FOUR arrived today. Please buy it.

I'm going to have one interview included in every issue of Red Lightbulbs from now on. So that's cool.

IM NOT GONNA GET ENOUGH SLEEP TONIGHT.

I want to be a part of everything. I always feel really worried about missing out on things. I want to contribute more to the community. I want to support people. I want to show people things that they wouldn''t see otherwise.

I haven't drawn anything in a while.

Instead I've liked 22320 posts on tumblr. Is that the way that I want to support people? Well yes I want to keep doing that but I also want to do something more far reaching. Idk. I will never be content.

I just made two new tumblrs for potential proojects. WHO THE FUCK AM I TO MAKE PROJECTS? THERE ARE ALREADY SO MANY JOURNALS AND SHIT OUT THERE. WHY WOULD ANYONE GIVE A FUCK ABOUT MINE? Can I please make a living from this shit? I never want to get a job.

I'm drinking chocolate milk.

Will I ever write a book?

This just became a rambling rant.

RESPECT ME

Haven't done shit today, not gonna do shit today.

Thought, 'What if I ran against Poncho Peligroso for the position of Poet Laureate 2012?'

Had a dream that I lost a bunch of twitter followers.

Here are two extracts from an email I sent Maggie Lee:
I got into the internet lit stuff at the beginning of last year. I was reading Spike Jonze's wikipedia page trying to find out what his next project was going to be after Where The Wild Things Are. I found out he had bought the rights to Light Boxes by Shane Jones. I looked into Shane Jones and found out about Publishing Genius Press and HTMLGiant. I bought some books and read stuff. I added some writers on facebook. I was a fan but I didn't contribute to the scene at all. Then around April(?) this year three things happened: I became facebook friends with Steve Roggenbuck (I can't remember who added who) and we commented back and forth a lot on a wall post, Let People Poems was launched and I posted a poem there and got a good response which gave me confidence, and one day for no real reason I wrote everything is fantastic on a few hundred people's walls. Everything has just grown from there
and
I will never complete this novel


How do people read really long books?

Why does my interview on HTMLGiant only have two comments?

I paid Vimeo $10US to let me upload a video that was larger than the size they allow you to upload for free. I now have Vimeo Plus or something. Can I monetise my crappily produced videos?

I feel fat.

Here are my two least publicised social media accounts:
http://www.formspring.me/Jacksonieuwland
http://lookbook.nu/jacksonnieuwland

I have a new form that I am trying on twitter:
http://twitter.com/#!/slapbatman

The poetic technique I have been using the most lately is 'I put the _ in _'. Thanks Chris Toll.

I might be part of the 1%

Whenever someone uses the word fantastic I get excited.

I have also been making use of the poetic technique where you put the word sometimes in front of a line.

This post isn't going to have any pictures.

Yesterday I thought about how easy it is to get lost in the internet and convince yourself that you are talented. (You being me)

I wish this ustream would start so that I would be distracted from myself.

I have been posting a lot of rap videos on facebook recently.

Jordan Castro is the person I have asked the most questions on formspring.

I used to think that formspring was called forumspring.

How do I get more notes on my tumblr posts?
The one with the goal of getting 100 notes only got 35.

If I'm not going to write my novel I should at least read something. What should I read?

I am listening to Jay-Z.

Does adding labels to my blog posts get more people to see them?

I should eat lunch. What should I eat?

THE END