Here's a photo on me sitting in a chair in my old room

I am writing this in my new room which is also my old room. It was my room but then I moved away and my sister took it. Then I moved back home. Then when my sister was going through a hard time my sister  moved into another room but still used this room sometimes. Now I have moved back into this room. The wireless doesn‘t reach this room. I am writing this in word and then I will take my laptop into another room and copy paste it into word. I wrote this post last night but then my computer crashed and I lost it. I am recreating this post.

I yelled extremely quietly, “Where the fuck is the forty year old virgin.”

I want to make iconic things. I used to always think that the best rap lines were just like sayings. I guess I meant memes but I didn’t know that word yet. Also really clever ones.

I am watching Knocked Up.

Have been referring to this room as the love shack. I just misspelt shack as shake. This room is not connected to the rest of the house.

When I said the forty year old virgin I was referring to Knocked Up.

It is only a week til Christmas. What are you doing over the holiday period?

I need to create a memorable meme separate from everything is fantastic. All my other memes are either not memorable or just offshoots of everything is fantastic.

I need to pee. Then me and my mum are going to play tennis but first we have to wait for my dad to get home with the car so I’ll probably check facebook while I’m waiting =f

David Fishkind

I am writing these words in the library:

Earlier this year there was a period when I considered facebook my main creative outlet. Now I feel uncomfortable and pretentious using the term ‘main creative outlet’ but this blog is probably it. Why? Partly because of read Selected Unpublished Blog Posts Of A Mexican Panda Express Employee and Nothing. Partly because this is what I need at the moment to translate my life into something conceivable. I need to read more David Markson. I need to understand what I’m trying to do.

I wish I worked on the three books that I keep thinking about as much as I work on this blog. Maybe their time will come. Maybe it will not.

Today as I was leaving the house my sister asked me what I was reading. I said ‘Nothing’ and showed her this book and she laughed.

As I was walking reading this book and old man coming the other way up the street said ‘Boo’ and startled me and I felt concerned for a disproportionate amount of time.

Just outside the library a person who asks people to sign up for donations said to me ‘Is that book about nothing?’ and I said ‘Yes’ and kept walking before she could say anything else.

My favourite spot in the library is taken so I am sitting here instead.

As I was walking to this spot I saw this book on a shelf. It interested me but I cannot get it out because I set myself the rule of only two things borrowed from the library at a time. Is these rules useful? Sometimes reading one page is an achievement. Sometimes it is a joy. Is it better to force myself to read a book I know I want to read and already know so much about or to open something new? A balance is probably best. I need to find the correct ratio. But a ratio needs to be monitored and regulated and that is more rules.

I was hoping to maybe write some of some other things while I was here but I don’t have time. It is time for me to go to my dad’s school and work with children. Work with children could mean that I am doing the same work as the children. Afterwards I will come back here. Maybe I will work on writing things that I want to write, or maybe I will find Project X on the shelf again and read it and read it and read it


I am writing these words on my return to the library:

Late to my second shift in a row and I have only worked two shifts but an hour and a half isn’t a shift and it isn’t really work, isn’t even really volunteering, they are doing me a favour letting me come in. Today I did get to help the kids with reading. I tried to make clever/funny comments on the text to impress them. I learnt that lions cannot chew and have to swallow their food whole. There is a boy named Caesar who is intelligent but easily distracted and I am trying to help him focus. Next week I think I will go for longer. I will lead Caesar by example in focussing.

I swam in the rain. I had a medium pace lane to myself and I enjoyed the privacy for my selfprescribed 30 length but then was chased off by two colourful swimcapped men. I showered and in the changing room saw old men’s penises. There were bikinied girls in the spa.

Here I am. With Nothing on one side of me and Project X on the other and instead of choosing between them I will probably try to make them complement each other. Typing into this documented called fdsasgvvsad. This post is too glossy and not honest enough but I cannot censor my lies. This blog has rules and one of them is that there are no rules.

I have decided I am buying books for Christmas presents. I am supporting good literature and not giving a fuck what my friends and family actually want.

There is an election three days. I still haven’t researched the various parties policies. I am aware of my ignorance. Is that an oxymoron? My sister is working at a poll booth if that’s what they’re called. She will give people their ballots if that’s what they’re called. See how I am ignorant?

And now I have run out of words that will fit here and I will try to fit words into other places


I am adding these last words as I lie in bed:

I read two and a half pages of Nothing, unable to fully hold the words in my mind. But that’s okay because that is similar what Blake is describing.

I read one and a bit pages of Project X, which wasn’t enough to figure out what it is. But that’s okay because I can return to it tomorrow.

I walked on tight calves as my stomach swallowed itself. When I arrived home the leftover lasagne I had expected had disappeared and I began berating myself for not buying a meal in town but then my mum swooped in and piled me with pita and hummus and bread and beans. I drank water and ate a nashi pear

I'm tired

Haven't done shit today, not gonna do shit today.

Thought, 'What if I ran against Poncho Peligroso for the position of Poet Laureate 2012?'

Had a dream that I lost a bunch of twitter followers.

Here are two extracts from an email I sent Maggie Lee:
I got into the internet lit stuff at the beginning of last year. I was reading Spike Jonze's wikipedia page trying to find out what his next project was going to be after Where The Wild Things Are. I found out he had bought the rights to Light Boxes by Shane Jones. I looked into Shane Jones and found out about Publishing Genius Press and HTMLGiant. I bought some books and read stuff. I added some writers on facebook. I was a fan but I didn't contribute to the scene at all. Then around April(?) this year three things happened: I became facebook friends with Steve Roggenbuck (I can't remember who added who) and we commented back and forth a lot on a wall post, Let People Poems was launched and I posted a poem there and got a good response which gave me confidence, and one day for no real reason I wrote everything is fantastic on a few hundred people's walls. Everything has just grown from there
and
I will never complete this novel


How do people read really long books?

Why does my interview on HTMLGiant only have two comments?

I paid Vimeo $10US to let me upload a video that was larger than the size they allow you to upload for free. I now have Vimeo Plus or something. Can I monetise my crappily produced videos?

I feel fat.

Here are my two least publicised social media accounts:
http://www.formspring.me/Jacksonieuwland
http://lookbook.nu/jacksonnieuwland

I have a new form that I am trying on twitter:
http://twitter.com/#!/slapbatman

The poetic technique I have been using the most lately is 'I put the _ in _'. Thanks Chris Toll.

I might be part of the 1%

Whenever someone uses the word fantastic I get excited.

I have also been making use of the poetic technique where you put the word sometimes in front of a line.

This post isn't going to have any pictures.

Yesterday I thought about how easy it is to get lost in the internet and convince yourself that you are talented. (You being me)

I wish this ustream would start so that I would be distracted from myself.

I have been posting a lot of rap videos on facebook recently.

Jordan Castro is the person I have asked the most questions on formspring.

I used to think that formspring was called forumspring.

How do I get more notes on my tumblr posts?
The one with the goal of getting 100 notes only got 35.

If I'm not going to write my novel I should at least read something. What should I read?

I am listening to Jay-Z.

Does adding labels to my blog posts get more people to see them?

I should eat lunch. What should I eat?

THE END

Caro took a bunch of photos of me on skype last night

I had a meeting with my case manager person today. The meeting was at eleven but I only left my house at eleven (I had got caught up on facebook) so I ran and it only took me 7 minutes to get there. Seems good. Also I had a real good run last night.

Meeting was good. Instead of trying to therapy/counsel me, it seems like she is try to teach me to do it myself. It felt like a class. She wrote stuff of a whiteboard. She gave me some 'worksheets' to fill out (theyre not really worksheets but I'm going with a school analogy (seems good for my 'rehabilitation' (lol) to be like school because then it will be easier to go back to school eventually (pretty soon really!))). One of the 'worksheets' is a weekly activity plan. It reminds me of having to write weekly training schedules and stuff for basketball.

Finally recorded me reading the second half of The No Hellos Diet. THe video is uploading now. I tried to do it the other day but my computer crashed. I can't remember if i Mentiioned that in that days blog post or not. Caro suggested I blog about what I'm reading and what it makes me think so here. While I was reading The No Hellos Diet I thought about: trying to speak loud enough, how long iit was taking, how many pages I had left, whether I had read certain scenes from the book in the previous video or not, stuffing up some of the words, having a sore throat, how many pages I had left, how cool a few of the sections were.

I'm still reading Nothing and You Are A LIttle Bit Happier Than I Am. Possibley finishing the tao tonight. Was thinking I might go to the library today but it doesnt look like I'llhave time. A Plague Of Wolves And Women by Riley Michael Parker arrived today but I don't know how soon I'll read that.

DAMN THIS IS A BORING ASS BLOG POST.

Have you ever considered snapping your thumb off? It seems really doable.

I'm eating dates. Enjoying it a lot. People seriously need to get more into dried fruit.

Just took the sheets of my bed and put them in the washing machine. Hi, marry me, I am a domestic god.

Leaning against my bed's headboard without a pillow for cushioning. Extremely uncomrtable. I don't recommend it guys.

Even without my sheets my bed still has a shitload of stuff on it: books, clothes, bowl, dates, bottle, scanner, papers.

An interview I did is up at HTMLGiant. Proud of that. I wouldnt be writing this blog if it wasnt for that site. Would love to be a real contributor. I have some ideas for articles. LOL dream a little smaller amirite?

After my meeting today the part of my jeans at the back of my knees was sweaty. EW!

THere are a lot of people on gmail chat right now. I wonder if any of them have noticed this as well. I wonder if we're all just sitting not chatting to anyone, thinking about how amny people are online of gmail chat right now.

Just ate a date and thought 'date me'

It seems like it's impossible to be well read. There are too many different spheres of knowledge/literature. If you read everything your head would swell up all malformed and disgusting and brains would start leaking out of your ears and you'd be panicking, scooping them up and stuffing them into your mouth.

THERE'S NO REASON NOT TO BE NICE

uwgt

I am listening to the directors commentary of I'm Still Here. Why? I don't know.
I'm so tired.
I'm so tired.
I'm so tired
I'm so tired.
Im so tired.
I'm so tired.
I'm so tired.
I'm so tired.
I'm so itred.
I'm so titred.
I'm so tired.
I usually get depressed when I'm tired.
LETS HOPE THAT DOESNT HAPPEN THIS TIME LOL

There is a person on facebook who poked me once and then I poked them back and they poked me back and so one. The normal poking relationship. BUT ME AND THIS PERSON ARE NOT FACEBOOK FRIENDS. Crazy right? I looked at their page once. I think we had like two mutual friends. Neither of us has tried adding the other.

I listened to this song one hundread times today. It didn't annoy me until it annoyed me, then it annoyed me.

I'm glad this blog is secret because this post doesn't feel up to scratch. I often get itchy. I'm not sure if it's more than other people do or not. Maybe it's a nervous tick. I have some of those. What if a teacher was really anxious about some grading they were doing and so they gave you a nervous tick. Is scratching still a thing? Like with DJs. Do people still know what crossfaders are?

I ate some dates. I've never been on a date. There is that scene in Robin Hood: Men In Tights where the bad guy askes Maid Marion if she wants a date and it's a trick. Remember?

I did a ustream.

I am beiing part of the blog revival/revolution but it seems like blogs never left nz. Alice and Stacey both blog regularly. The daily aspect is cool though. I do that on my 'real' blog too. SOmetimes it's hard but it's good because it makes me do things. Doing things makes me feel better about myself. I'm so tired

I just farted.

SOmetimes I'm so tired that I can't do anything. Not even get ready for bed. So I get stuck in a certain zone. I am on my way there now. I need something to eat. I want pretzels but there's no way I'm going out to buy any. I'll just see what's in the kitchen. Goodnight